Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not.

#FridayFictioneers – 11/7/14 – Retribution

with 31 comments

Every Wednesday Rochelle Wisoff-Fields publishes a photo prompt to inspire writers to write 100-words of flash fiction or poetry.

At any point during the following week, the Friday Fictioneers post their 100-word tales. Read the other stories by clicking below.

 

I’m not sure what has happened to time – it seems to be running away from me continually. Missing Friday Fictioneers is not good, missing two weeks is bad: I am a bad girl; I will try harder. That said, I am not at all sure about my (belated) effort this week. Read and criticise away.

Thanks to Kelly Sands for the photo and to Rochelle for doing a great and reliable job hosting.

 

PHOTO PROMPT - Copyright - Kelly Sands

Copyright – Kelly Sands

 

 

Retribution

(Genre: morality tale?; 100-words)

The sky had had enough. The town’s inhabitants had sunbathed for weeks and all she received in return was abuse from those with sunburnt shoulders. Her senses were assailed by curling smoke and the smell of burning food.

All the hot air sent her way made the sky itch.

She soothed herself by hiding behind cotton wool clouds, which brought more complaint, so she spoke to her friend the wind. He whipped the gathering moisture into a tumbling frenzy before thunderous cymbals clapped.

When the townsfolk screamed anew at the sky’s duplicity, she smiled, unable to hear above the deluge.

 

Friday Fictioneers

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Written by Sarah Ann

July 12, 2014 at 10:56 am

31 Responses

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  1. Hiding is always human’s reactions

    Yoshiko

    >

    Yoshiko

    July 12, 2014 at 10:57 am

  2. I love the idea of giving personalities to each aspect of weather. Nicely done!

    Jessie Ansons

    July 12, 2014 at 12:28 pm

  3. Great spin on the picture. Mother Nature reigns!

    marysmoments4life

    July 12, 2014 at 12:39 pm

  4. Love the mythical touch there.

    yarnspinnerr

    July 12, 2014 at 2:19 pm

  5. Dear Sarah Ann,

    I never thought of ascribing a personality to the sky. Intriguing and inventive.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    rochellewisoff

    July 12, 2014 at 2:20 pm

    • Thank you. I’m very flattered by intriguing and inventive. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 9:37 pm

  6. Obviously not a good idea to anger the sky! Lovely imaginative writing. One tiny niggle – did you mean ‘bathed’ or ‘sunbathed’ in the first bit?

    elappleby

    July 12, 2014 at 7:16 pm

    • Thank you 🙂 And yes, you’re right re: the bathing – will go change.

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 9:41 pm

  7. Sounds like the inhabitants were a stinky lot. Perhaps some water will help cool their temperament.

    rgayer55

    July 12, 2014 at 7:21 pm

    • Now I hadn’t thought of it like that. Let’s hope they freshen up.

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 9:39 pm

  8. I can’t help it, I have to say it. You go, Sky! This town sounds like it’s filled with ingrates.
    My work is here.
    http://dothedead.wordpress.com/2014/07/12/nuclear-holocaust-2179-the-looming-spectre/

    spectraghostseeker

    July 13, 2014 at 2:09 am

    • Thanks for your support for the sky. 🙂 Off to read yours now.

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 9:43 pm

  9. i love the perspective from the sky’s point of view especially that first sentence – the sky being fed up. 🙂 great story, Sarah!

    Sun

    July 13, 2014 at 2:50 am

  10. We (the Chinese) honour the sky (T’ien) and honour it often. Now I know why. 🙂

    Lily

    hafong

    July 13, 2014 at 3:45 pm

    • Thanks for the comment. Good to know I was tapping in to something.

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 8:03 pm

  11. This is a wonderful take on the prompt. Better late than never – you “done” good. Alicia

    aliciajamtaas

    July 13, 2014 at 4:37 pm

    • Thank you. Good to know you enjoyed. I’ve been struggling with prompts and time. Sometimes taking a leap pays off.

      Sarah Ann

      July 14, 2014 at 7:54 pm

  12. Good for that sky! We should be *kinder* to nature! 🙂

    Blog It Or Lose It

    July 14, 2014 at 9:13 pm

  13. Nice language, Sarah. I like the thunderous cymbals clapping and hiding behind cotton wool clouds. Miss Mother Nature can do whatever she pleases! We should respect her more. She’s the one really in charge. Nice work! I realize what you say about being a bad girl. It’s been tough lately. So, good girl. You did it!

    Amy Reese

    July 15, 2014 at 12:38 am

    • Thank you, Amy. Happy you liked the language and it wasn’t overdone. I have been a little disorganised lately, but hoping to get in to a new writing routine soon.

      Sarah Ann

      July 16, 2014 at 4:54 pm

  14. Sarah Ann, Hearing the sky’s viewpoint was interesting. Those people need to blame someone else for once. They must be an unhappy lot. Well written and a happy ending as far as the sky was concerned. 🙂 —Susan

    patriciaruthsusan

    July 15, 2014 at 9:45 am

    • People always like someone else to blame. I’m glad you see it as a happy ending for the sky 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 16, 2014 at 4:55 pm

  15. That’s clever. Lots of food for thought here.

    patrickprinsloo

    July 15, 2014 at 12:36 pm

    • Thank you. Clever’s probably over-egging the pudding though 😉

      Sarah Ann

      July 16, 2014 at 4:56 pm

  16. It seems people can’t be happy no matter what… too much sun, too many clouds… to much rain 🙂

    jannatwrites

    July 16, 2014 at 2:55 am

    • We Brits are renowned for never being happy with our weather – too hot and humid when it’s sunny, too wet for too long when it rains. It’s time we gave the weather a break and the forecaster’s gave up trying – that way I think we’d be a more contented nation.

      Sarah Ann

      July 16, 2014 at 4:58 pm


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