Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not.

Circles – #gargleblaster163

with 35 comments

 

He will never understand.

When sober, her words confuse him and apologies are easy.

When drunk, the loss she cries washes over and around him, leaving him dry.

They have danced here before; will do again. Her heart aches with that certainty.

 



 

 

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Written by Sarah Ann

May 26, 2014 at 12:57 pm

35 Responses

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  1. Beautifully done, Sarah Ann! Love the way you paint the contrast between drunk and sober.

    Suzanne

    May 26, 2014 at 2:56 pm

  2. I like how this builds–the third and fourth lines are Wow.

    Jennifer G. Knoblock

    May 26, 2014 at 3:25 pm

  3. This reminds me of Marriage Boot Camp on WEtv except the woman is the husband and the man is the wife. This describes them perfectly. And they keep going through it and will continue to do so.

    M. L. Sexton

    May 26, 2014 at 3:43 pm

    • Some patterns are too entrenched to break. Thanks for commenting.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 8:57 pm

  4. Circles within circles; never ending.

    jacquelinecaseypoetry

    May 26, 2014 at 5:38 pm

  5. “The loss she cries washes over and around him, leaving him dry.” So poignant.

    fatgirlinboxinggloves

    May 26, 2014 at 6:14 pm

    • Thanks. I worked at that line quite a bit so I’m happy to know it works.

      Sarah Ann

      May 26, 2014 at 8:45 pm

  6. You captured the heartbreaking pain of certain futility so well.

    C.C.

    May 26, 2014 at 7:09 pm

    • Thank you. I hadn’t realised that’s what I was doing, but futility does some it up.

      Sarah Ann

      May 26, 2014 at 8:43 pm

  7. And that is exactly what it’s like. Nicely done!

    thewizardsword

    May 26, 2014 at 8:44 pm

  8. This describes the contrast so well. Lovely, aching writing.

    theinnerzone

    May 27, 2014 at 1:45 am

    • Great to hear my writing aches 🙂 Thank you.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:16 pm

      • I apologize if it came out the wrong way, I meant that it’s great in describing the ache. 🙂

        theinnerzone

        May 27, 2014 at 10:56 pm

      • No it didn’t come out wrong – I understood and it was good to hear. 🙂

        Sarah Ann

        May 28, 2014 at 5:01 pm

  9. I also like the contrast between drunk and sober and how both states lead to confusion. Well done.

    Meg

    May 27, 2014 at 2:12 am

    • I hadn’t thought of it like that, but you’re right, they do lead to confusion. Thanks for the read and comment.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:17 pm

  10. beautifully done.

    Robbie

    May 27, 2014 at 4:43 am

  11. The contrast and notion of the dance really pulled me in. Such strong emotions. Well done.

  12. Such a vicious circle, isn’t it? Loved how you captured the hurt

    Psych Babbler

    May 27, 2014 at 7:44 am

  13. Really like the title. It’s hard to know where it hurts when it hurts all the time. Well done.

    QueenOfTheDessert

    May 27, 2014 at 1:28 pm

    • I usually struggle with titles – this one came easily. Thanks for reading.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:36 pm

  14. ‘the loss she cries’ got to me. Have danced that dance. An elegant piece for an inelegant situation.

    KymmInBarcelona

    May 27, 2014 at 1:52 pm

    • Oh Kymm, your comments always trump my stories – an elegant for an inelegant – thank you!

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:27 pm

  15. Uff, the pain and confusion of ending a loving but destructive relationship. Captured masterfully! Thanks for this!

    innatejames

    May 27, 2014 at 6:36 pm

    • I’m glad the pain and confusion came across. I’m not sure they’re ready to end the dance yet though.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:29 pm

  16. This is a very visual depiction of a vicious cycle. Great job, Sarah Ann. Thanks for linking it up.

    Christine

    May 27, 2014 at 9:27 pm

    • Thanks. I hadn’t seen it as visual. I love comments, they make me see my words afresh.

      Sarah Ann

      May 27, 2014 at 10:30 pm

  17. Addiction is a mean thing. Marriage vows can melt easily.

    Ann Bennett

    May 27, 2014 at 11:05 pm


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