Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not.

#VisDare 28 – Obscured – New Beginnings

with 6 comments

This is my entry into this week’s Anonymous Legacy VisDare Challenge.

 

RULES:
150 words – or less.
Post entry to your blog and “link in”.
No blog? Post your 150 words in the comments.
(Please – no erotica or graphic violence.)
DON’T FORGET to read and comment on others’ entries!!
As always – thanks for participating!
–––––

 

 

 

 

New Beginnings (150 words)

When she enters the church, late, my fists clench, involuntarily. How long has it been?

The veil of her hat is almost opaque. I can’t see her bright eyes, or the nose that always wrinkled when she smiled. Only the bottom third of her face is visible, unmistakable, unforgettable.

If a man, her jaw would be complimented as chiselled. As a woman, it’s strong, and sometimes an insult. I know it as square, perched on a thin neck – there’s no way of dressing that up. She once told me they called her shed face at school, but images of bird tables flit through my mind. I push them away to concentrate on what the priest is saying.

At the end, as the coffin rolls away, I turn and see a tear, large and bulbous against the sharp jaw. For the first time, I know my mother did love my father.

 

 

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Written by Sarah Ann

July 16, 2013 at 8:42 pm

6 Responses

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  1. I was there Sarah, your imagery is well thought out. The silent soft tear against the sterness of her jaw. Enjoyed very much.

    ramblingsfromamum

    July 16, 2013 at 11:55 pm

    • Thanks Jenny. I think I should copy and paste your comment into the story as you summed it up better than I with ‘silent soft tear against the sterness’. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 17, 2013 at 8:40 pm

  2. Beautiful. every person has a sensitive side to them

    nightlake

    July 18, 2013 at 1:19 am

  3. This was wonderful writing. I’m visiting from 5 Sentence Fiction. I love how you described if her jaw had belonged to a man, it would have been complimenting. The ending was unexpected. I enjoyed all of the story.

    DonettaSd

    July 18, 2013 at 8:51 am

    • Thanks for the visit Donetta. I’m glad you liked the male-female comparison, and the rest of the story. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 18, 2013 at 10:37 pm


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