Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not; practising flash fiction.

#VisDare 28 – Obscured – New Beginnings

with 6 comments

This is my entry into this week’s Anonymous Legacy VisDare Challenge.


150 words – or less.
Post entry to your blog and “link in”.
No blog? Post your 150 words in the comments.
(Please – no erotica or graphic violence.)
DON’T FORGET to read and comment on others’ entries!!
As always – thanks for participating!





New Beginnings (150 words)

When she enters the church, late, my fists clench, involuntarily. How long has it been?

The veil of her hat is almost opaque. I can’t see her bright eyes, or the nose that always wrinkled when she smiled. Only the bottom third of her face is visible, unmistakable, unforgettable.

If a man, her jaw would be complimented as chiselled. As a woman, it’s strong, and sometimes an insult. I know it as square, perched on a thin neck – there’s no way of dressing that up. She once told me they called her shed face at school, but images of bird tables flit through my mind. I push them away to concentrate on what the priest is saying.

At the end, as the coffin rolls away, I turn and see a tear, large and bulbous against the sharp jaw. For the first time, I know my mother did love my father.




Written by Sarah Ann

July 16, 2013 at 8:42 pm

6 Responses

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  1. I was there Sarah, your imagery is well thought out. The silent soft tear against the sterness of her jaw. Enjoyed very much.


    July 16, 2013 at 11:55 pm

    • Thanks Jenny. I think I should copy and paste your comment into the story as you summed it up better than I with ‘silent soft tear against the sterness’. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 17, 2013 at 8:40 pm

  2. Beautiful. every person has a sensitive side to them


    July 18, 2013 at 1:19 am

  3. This was wonderful writing. I’m visiting from 5 Sentence Fiction. I love how you described if her jaw had belonged to a man, it would have been complimenting. The ending was unexpected. I enjoyed all of the story.


    July 18, 2013 at 8:51 am

    • Thanks for the visit Donetta. I’m glad you liked the male-female comparison, and the rest of the story. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      July 18, 2013 at 10:37 pm

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