Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not.

#FridayFictioneers – 24/5/13 – Speak after the beep

with 20 comments

Every Wednesday Rochelle Wisoff-Fields publishes a photo prompt to stimulate and inspire writers to write 100-words of flash fiction or poetry. Every Friday (or before) the Friday Fictioneers post their 100-word stories.

Visit Rochelle’s site for how to join in and read the other stories by clicking on the blue guy.


Copyright - Danny Bowman

Copyright – Danny Bowman

Speak after the beep (100 words)

‘Hi, it’s me. I’m sorry. I’m wimping out. I’m not strong enough to say this to your faces. I can’t do this anymore. I thought I could. I thought I’d get used to it, but I haven’t. I’m always the last to know, the last to understand. I know what you’ll say, but I have tried harder, persevered. It makes no difference, I still struggle. I don’t want to fail, to let you down. You both worked so hard to put me here. I’ll know you’ll be disappointed –’

‘Love, you tried. That’s all that matters. Pack your bags. Come home.’

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Written by Sarah Ann

May 24, 2013 at 12:35 pm

20 Responses

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  1. I love the format of this – the voice messages really work. I took it to perhaps be a university student who feels it isn’t working for them, excecpt for the ‘I’m always the last to know, the last to understand’ line, which doesn’t quite fit with that scenario.

    claireful

    May 24, 2013 at 1:06 pm

    • Hi Claire,
      That’s what I was going for, a student or someone who had followed a parent in to a career. I wasn’t happy with the last to know line – it does stand out demanding greater explanation, but I didn’t have enough words.
      Thanks for reading.

      Sarah Ann

      May 28, 2013 at 12:02 pm

  2. Everyone’s trying to make me cry today, it seems. Isn’t that just what we want to hear when we feel defeated? You’ve captured this very well, darling.

    Helena Hann-Basquiat

    May 24, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    • Not trying to make you cry, honest. But yes, I think definitely that’s what we want to here.

      Sarah Ann

      May 28, 2013 at 12:00 pm

  3. It leaves one wanting more.
    My friend Yeris and I created one that is far sillier and probably will leave people wishing we hadn’t written it at all!
    http://undeadinthenetherworld.blogspot.com/2013/05/hangin-on-telephone.html

    The Real Cie

    May 24, 2013 at 2:55 pm

    • Thanks but not sure I want to examine the failure s/he feels, to feel it is enough. Liked yours – loved the banter between Seven and Ten.

      Sarah Ann

      May 28, 2013 at 12:20 pm

  4. A sweet story of unconditional love.

    janet

    sustainabilitea

    May 24, 2013 at 6:33 pm

  5. A parents unconditional love and support, no matter how much the child may feel they are letting them down, they hold no grudges for they at least tried..and that’s what we ask of our children ‘just to try’ 🙂

    ramblingsfromamum

    May 25, 2013 at 5:43 am

    • I’m still trying, although don’t worry so much about what my parents think these days. 🙂

      Sarah Ann

      May 28, 2013 at 12:11 pm

  6. Liked this a lot.

    petrujviljoen

    May 25, 2013 at 1:41 pm

  7. I can feel the pain and the resolution. I hope he knows it will be okay. He will find his niche, one day.

    lingeringvisions

    May 27, 2013 at 9:14 am

    • I hope Dad’s reassuring voice saying ‘Come home’ is enough for him to know. Thanks for the comment – pain and resolution coming across is good.

      Sarah Ann

      May 28, 2013 at 12:10 pm

  8. I love the sweetness in this… and it worked very well with the answering machine.

  9. Very, very sweet.

    waitingforaname

    May 29, 2013 at 4:39 am

  10. a sweet story.. i loved the ending.

    kz

    June 2, 2013 at 4:07 pm


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