Sarah Ann Hall

Reporting on writing in progress or, more probably, not.

#FridayFictioneers – 3/5/13 – The Building & The City Dweller

with 26 comments

Every Wednesday Rochelle Wisoff-Fields publishes a photo prompt to stimulate and inspire writers to write 100-words of flash fiction or poetry. Every Friday (or before) the Friday Fictioneers post their 100-word stories.

Visit Rochelle’s site for how to join in and read the other stories by clicking on the blue guy.


 

I love this week’s picture from Kent Bonham. It set off lots of thoughts in my head and I ended up with two stories. Comments welcomed.

Copyright -KentBonham

Copyright -Kent Bonham

 

The City Dweller (100 words)

This is my favourite view in the city. When they cleared the site to erect it they offered to re-home me. I didn’t want to move to the sticks. I love being at the centre of things: my nostrils assailed by exquisite cologne battling with rotting food; my eyelids reddened by the permanent glow – flashing lights heralding some form of excitement, always.

Wide-eyed tourists are surprised to see us hoboes lying about. Caring locals donate the occasional coffee or coins from their pockets. The majority are oblivious and unseeing, leaving us natives to revel in the city’s rich sights.

 

The Building (100 words)

It has stood for more years than anyone can remember. The designer, once fêted, is now ridiculed. Time has moved on and no one quite understands it anymore.

The building has loved, is loved by, its inhabitants. It has driven men to distraction with its beauty and illusion. Juliet stood on its balconies while Romeo called out underneath, perturbed by its stonework.

The fluting of its balconies mirrors the veins of its skin. The windows are its eyes looking out, letting others glimpse an unfamiliar world inside. Its doors, standing open, invite everyone in, but only the brave step forward.

 

 

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Written by Sarah Ann

May 3, 2013 at 8:52 pm

26 Responses

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  1. Two very different angles on the prompt. Enjoyed them both.

    Sandra

    May 4, 2013 at 7:23 am

    • The second story grew out of the first one as the knight of the road started describing what he could see, and I ran out of words. Thanks for reading.

      Sarah Ann

      May 6, 2013 at 7:37 pm

  2. Lovely writing.. I really enjoyed the first one the most. I think we often underestimate people less fortunate.. but many have an ability and see and observe. Love that voice

    • Thank you, Björn. I agree we tend to underestimate anyone or anything we don’t fullly understand. I’m very glad his voice came across in the first one.

      Sarah Ann

      May 6, 2013 at 7:40 pm

  3. I loved your second story and vivid imagery…giving the building human qualities. I especially liked “The fluting of its balconies mirrors the veins of its skin.” And the hint of it somehow being sinister at the end. Wonderful!

    Maggie Grace

    May 4, 2013 at 8:17 pm

    • Thank you so much, Maggie. I love getting people’s comments and learning what they find in my stories. I hadn’t meant to put a sinister spin on the end, but on re-reading I can see that it’s there.

      Sarah Ann

      May 6, 2013 at 7:42 pm

  4. Liked them both – but the second one really stood out as something special. I tried to pick out a bit I liked best but it is consistently brilliant from the first to the last line. One of my favourites this week.

    elappleby

    May 4, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    • I’m smiling from ear to ear. Thank you for that lovely comment.

      Sarah Ann

      May 6, 2013 at 7:43 pm

  5. I like the second one best.

    janet

    sustainabilitea

    May 5, 2013 at 1:47 am

  6. My favorite: The first one.

    lingeringvisions

    May 5, 2013 at 6:00 am

  7. I enjoyed both flashes.

    neenslewy

    May 5, 2013 at 12:38 pm

  8. liked both of them. but the descriptions in the second one really captured attention. lovely work

    nightlake

    May 6, 2013 at 1:34 am

    • Thank you. Knowing I captured your attention is very encouraging.

      Sarah Ann

      May 6, 2013 at 8:09 pm

  9. Clapping 🙂

    yarnspinnerr

    May 6, 2013 at 8:55 am

  10. Dear Sarah,
    Two very different takes. And both well done. I like them both.
    shalom,
    Rochelle

    rochellewisoff

    May 6, 2013 at 10:14 am

  11. I liked both of them. Well done!

    claireful

    May 6, 2013 at 11:34 am

  12. Two strong pieces. Both worth reading and rereading.

    patrickprinsloo

    May 6, 2013 at 9:32 pm

  13. i really like both stories. my favorite line “The fluting of its balconies mirrors the veins of its skin.” wonderfully done

    kz

    May 8, 2013 at 1:28 am

  14. Liked ’em both. Not sure why “rotting food”. Is that part of the “centre of things”? Final para of “The Building”: wow! Wish I had written that.

    patrickprinsloo

    May 13, 2013 at 2:26 pm


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